Kool Keith
aka Spankmaster
aka Dr Octagon
Quick update since it’s been a month. Pleased to say it looks like I have been quite busy, out and about plenty, and that makes me feel smug and cool. Here’s a nice picture of Kool Keith (who was a highlight of this month) and a ladies bottom, to keep you reading.
Firstly I would like to comment on the joy that is the UK General Register Office of Births, Deaths and marriages. They have a lovely usable site with clear information, simple instructions and a shopping cart!
I never thought an agency like that in the UK (where I have visions of old men, with quill pens, in half glasses struggling through dusty archives of hand written ledgers) could provide such an efficient and smartly designed site, next working day delivery too! So should you need to prove your identity, discover you were adopted after all, gather evidence of your bigamist husband, or perhaps just want to know your time of birth for [Russell Grant’s online personalised horoscope](http://Russel Grant’s online personalised horoscope), you’re sorted.
In case I am shortly bundled from my desk toward the pub, I’ll make this a synopsis only of recent expeditions.
Went out and saw..#
- Rob in Den Bosch. My friend Big Rob is gracing the Netherlands with his not-insignificant presence. We saw the Catherdral, and some cute eet cafes, and Rob laughed at my puny drinking capacity (compared to his).
- Jim Rose Circus. Cool 10 years ago, now 4 people, or 2 not including Jim and his wife. However, still entertaining with alcohol.
- Kool Keith + DJ Evil E. Mad, bad, hip-hop rapper Kool Keith in the Melkweg, Amsterdam. Show featured home made porn playing on a TV on the stage whilst Keith took time out half way through the show to make a critical analysis of his favourite porn mags.
I waved my hands in the air.
Really.
“Everybody say Woooah”.
My mate Nicks Robodock Pics
- Robodock. Crusty vibe circa 1989 mixed with experimental art, slapstick comedy (the Dexter’s Lab style bar in particular) and deranged electronics.
Films#
- I Robot. I quite liked this although I can’t remember why, I just generally enjoyed it. Oh, and Will Smith didn’t get smoochy with the attractive scientist, which impressed me. You could do much worse.
- The Village. If you don’t figure this one out in the first 10 minutes, you’re slow and you deserve this plodding, self-indulgent pile of a “period” thriller. Awful.
- Eternal Sunshine of the spotless mind. Best Charlie Kaufman yet. Funny, frantic, schizophrenic but with likable characters, and some lush photography. Neither Jim Carey nor Kate Winslet is deeply irritating, to my mind a first for both.
- The Bourne Supremacy. Shaky camera work does not make this edgy or tense. Good car chase at the end rewards those who stayed awake.
- The Stepford Wives. Strangely crap for such an obvious gift of a story. Up-to-date additions of a gay Stepford husband, and Kidman as a reality TV producer, were cheap. Bette Midler was actually quite good and got the only (2?) good lines.
On a more personal note; last week I set free my dreadlock fringe and returned it to it’s original free-flowing (read fluffy) hair. This was because, internet hyperchondriact that I am, I suspected my hair was thinning on top due having had dreadlocks most of my adult life.
It only took a minute on the net to diagnose myself, and find I was condemned to surfing sad, lonely, “balding man self-help” forums. I think I have Traumatic alopecia. Arghhhhhh!
“Traumatic alopecia is where hair has become weakened and falls out due constant tension. A severe ponytail, tight braids, and styles like dreadlocks, can contribute to hair loss.”
Mint shampoo, anyone?